And Another Thing…

Harry Potter & the Methods of Rationality movi...

Harry Potter & the Methods of Rationality movie poster (Photo credit: claireviolet82)

Shamelessly pilfered from “The Write Stuff“:

  • It’s OK to have an orphan in the story, just as long as it isn’t one of the main characters, the hero, or the love interest. Contrary to popular opinion, orphans just make things complicated when it comes to the romance part of the story.
  • When is comes to the hunky human or the cold brooding vampire, the girl will ALWAYS choose the vampire. Case in point: Twilight.
  • It’s ok to have two characters date each other. Just make sure to build up the relationship gradually and not have it come out of left field suddenly. Also, no self-respecting male main character will ever date his best friend’s younger sister. That is not good and relationships such as these will always fall apart at the seams.
  • It’s ok to have a female character that is not “strong”; the strong female character will suddenly crack if she has to deal with…”that thing” (which is called love!)
  • Plus, the power of love canNOT save the world! Buttkicking does.
  • If you have an all-white cast and you have five main characters, take out four of the white people and substitute four minority characters. Better yet, the only white character will never be the leader of the group.
  • Don’t do the usual two boys and one girl trio; that trio has been way overdone. Instead, substitute in two girls and one boy or make it a group effort. Don’t throw in any romance between the friends, though.
  • The person who believes in monsters or aliens and other things is usually insane and are not to be trusted. Instead, they should be carted off to a hospital immediately. Same goes for someone who claims to be an alien from a different planet. There’s no such things as aliens, unless you’re into science fiction, of course!
  • The white guy who is surrounded by natives in a foreign land will be mistrusted, even if he does great things to help them.
  • The black man will not have any interest in the urban lifestyle at all; instead, he will be a responsible citizen and not a burden on society.
  • The Asian will have ZERO knowledge of martial arts or anime.
  • Latino/Latina isn’t into the Mexican lifestyle or adheres to the Latino stereotype. They have better things to do.
  • A couple that becomes engaged when the story begins will break up in the middle and at the end, they will have forgotten that they were engaged at all.
  • When the vampire stands in the sunlight, he does not turn into ashes, but he becomes a pasty white corpse. (kind of makes you wish he actually sparkled, huh?)
  • The “ugly person” will stay ugly, as no amount of makeup or nice clothes will ever make them beautiful. If they are the love interest, they will often be cast aside for someone more attractive than they are.
  • There cannot be an “only child” of a dead couple, as there could be a secret twin of a secret sibling nearby.
  • Wizards and witches are to be portrayed as they should be portrayed: as old men/women who are skilled in the powers of magic. Not as teenagers.
  • Even though you have a magical school and whatnot, it should NOT be modeled after Hogwarts. In fact, magic should be taught by those who are mature and patient enough to deal with angst-ridden teenagers.
  • The mentor will be solely the mentor and not try to manipulate the hero at any time.
  • The bad guy who does evil for the sake of being evil will quickly lose credibility. Same goes with the hero.
  • A girl who exists solely to be the main character’s love interest will die a horrible death. So will the younger sister of the best friend. The orphan can also suffer if they are written as the main character’s love interest as well.
  • The cruel relatives/stepparents is no excuse to feel sympathy for any character.
  • Love triangles, as popular as they are, do not make the story. A good plotline does. Plus, you can’t be in love with two different people at the same time. You must choose one or the other.
  • The hero/heroine never falls in love with the orphan.
  • The baseborn character can rise from their humble backgrounds and be even greater than their trueborn siblings.
  • Supernatural creatures, dragons, and villains have rights, and they will drag you into the courtroom and you will be accused of attempted murder.

Well, that’s all the time that we have for “The Fan Fiction Revolution”. I hope to see you all again soon with more fan fiction essays!

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2 thoughts on “And Another Thing…

  1. Pingback: Immortal Perfection – The Amaranth and the Plot Hammer | Francis James Franklin (Alina Meridon)

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